Scheana Shay On Her Mexican Heritage Journey

One thing actually attention-grabbing and I believe actually relatable to lots of people that you simply write about is rising up “feeling like [you] needed to conceal being half Mexican,” as you didn’t really feel Latina sufficient to slot in in school, and concurrently felt such as you caught out whenever you have been along with your quick household, since you seemed completely different than they did. You’ve additionally spoken about how reconciling your emotions with that is “the following chapter of your life.” What has that seemed like for you to this point, and what’s your relationship along with your heritage like now?

I really feel like previously, you realize, I simply hadn’t all the time been snug speaking about my Latin heritage, and never as a result of I am embarrassed or ashamed. Actually, fairly the alternative. I am so proud to be Mexican, however I simply type of felt, like, a little bit of imposter syndrome. I do know one of many primary causes [why] was my dad, the person who raised me. He is Dutch, blonde hair, blue eyes, and my mother has blonde hair, inexperienced eyes. My Latin heritage comes from my organic father’s aspect, who was all the time in my life, however extra type of from a distance. That is not who raised me. 

I did not develop up in a family talking Spanish, which I want I did. I want my daughter did. However I by no means wished my dad to really feel like he wasn’t sufficient, or he wasn’t, you realize, my actual dad, as a result of that is my dad, that is who raised me. So I type of hid that a part of my life. And, you realize, not being raised with, like I mentioned, the language, the tradition, I simply felt like I did not slot in. I felt like I could not inform people who I used to be Mexican as a result of my final title was Jancan, and my mother and father are white, so [people] weren’t going to grasp that.

However yeah, going again to the imposter syndrome, I really feel like that is simply one thing I’ve struggled with. I by no means wish to be seen as simply making the most of the optimistic elements of this group — you realize, like this chance earlier than me proper now — without having to take care of the challenges that this group faces in America. What we’re going by means of proper now could be so loopy. 

I actually attempt to all the time keep out of politics, as a result of I am all the time afraid of claiming the improper factor. If you happen to take heed to my podcast, you realize I do say little, however I really feel just like the challenges and racism that the Latin group faces, particularly within the heightened newer occasions, with all the pieces with ICE, it is not even a political problem at this level. It is a human problem. I’ve heard so many tales of individuals simply being ripped other than their households, and it is not okay. Individuals being focused due to their pores and skin coloration, their language, the music they take heed to, their job…it is simply…it is all improper. 

Just like the backlash of Dangerous Bunny doing the Tremendous Bowl? Straight up racist. It is not okay. I mentioned this on my podcast final week — the Tremendous Bowl is world, and music is common. That might, like, be one of many greatest Tremendous Bowl halftime exhibits ever. He is so iconic. I noticed him at SNL for the 50-year anniversary, and [he was] so good. 

However I do really feel like simply lastly opening as much as the world about my household and placing this all within the e book, I really feel like I lastly have a little bit of permission to additional discover my cultural id, and I actually do wish to lean into that extra. I inform my daughter she’s Mexican and she or he’s Polynesian. We’re making an attempt to show her concerning the tradition, which she would not utterly perceive but, as a result of she simply is aware of her Nani and her Opa. She’s assembly, although, her Hispanic cousins, we spend a whole lot of time with them in Vegas. 

And someday, I believe she’s going to ask, like, “Wait, so whose aspect of the household are they on?” as a result of she would not but understand there is a third aspect of the household — your cousins, your uncles, your tíos…however we spent a while with my Hispanic household in Vegas this previous weekend, and she or he acquired to be there with them. So it is all the time good once we can get collectively and simply really feel like a household.